I Faced My Biggest and Scariest Goal (and You Can Too!)
You know those pivotal moments in your life where you don’t realize at the time, but your entire universe was just turned upside down?
I had one of those last year and since that point, everything has changed.
It was a passing comment from a friend whilst we waited for a movie to start... a friend of hers had just gone through weight loss surgery and was doing great.
This surgery had been recommended to me multiple times. I consistently rolled my eyes and declared “I love food too much to have a surgery that stops me from eating”.
But something was different…
This time I didn’t reject the idea completely, this time I blanked out the whole movie whilst running the idea over in my head. Maybe it was time for change. Maybe it was time to put me first.
I guess I should rewind quickly.
I’ve always battled with my weight. Depression lead to a binge eating disorder which lead to misery and morbid obesity. Back then, I didn’t have a clear understanding of my size. I knew I was overweight... but was I really morbidly obese?! Uh yeah girl, you were.
This huge issue was at hand and I didn’t know where to begin – the change felt daunting. How do you shift 100kgs?
I have no freaking idea, so let’s just ignore the problem and eat more chocolate. Okay and Ben and Jerry's then some chips and bacon…
Every time I committed to a new diet regime, the goal felt so far away that I would give up time and time again. In my head, I needed to lose that 100kgs immediately, or I was a failure, and it’s easier to avoid things than fail.
But is it really?
I was in a constant battle of wanting change, but not loving myself enough to accept me as I was and commit to a journey of change.
This one conversation spurred a very intense lesson in self love and respect – it breaks my heart to say that a year ago, I could not confidently say I loved myself. I mean… I could say it… but did I mean it? I don’t know…
The way I was treating my body leads me to believe I didn’t. Full disclosure, the tears are flowing as I write this as it hurts to know I was so numb to life that I didn’t love me. I had no self-respect. No self-worth.
Shit needed to change.
I’m here to share with you how I got comfortable in my skin, how I got comfortable in my heart and how I now enjoy life – even if my body is not perfect.
I know you have something in your life that isn’t quite perfect and it feels daunting to face that – but girl, I believe in you!
So how did I do it…?
Breaking down my goal. 100kgs was daunting AF. Like WHAT. So I started changing my mindset. There were no more daunting numbers.
Creating a new goal: “Show myself some lovin” – that’s doable, that’s fun and achievable!
It wasn’t an all-out LOVE YO SELF immediately; it was all about taking a little tiny step in the right direction. The new goal didn’t make me want to vomit, or cry in a corner… it excited me for the change and gave me an excuse to online shop – because that’s showing self-love…. Right??? Let me justify it!!!
So boo, what big daunting goal is holding you back at the moment? What is it that you want to change but your mind is all “whooooah girl, that’s intense, let’s Netflix and chill instead?”
Write down that big scary thing, then break that bad boy down to a really small step in the right direction. Once you have your achievable thing that excites you rather than makes you vom – write that down and stick it errrrwhere!! Next to your bed, in your car, at your work desk – shove it all over the place so you are constantly reminded of that little step that is going to help you THRIVE!
BY ALYSSA TASKER
Alyssa is a coach and cheerleader for women that aren’t exactly loving their life and body. Fun, real talks and probably some colouring-in pencils, Alyssa will have you loudly professing “I FUCKING LOVE MYSELF” in no time!